Xat ChatboxThe penis thread
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The penis thread
by DipPotatos Sat Apr 09, 2011 8:24 pm
Greetings fellow penis lovers. I am sorry the last thread was deleted. But obviously we have this one so it's ok. Now here is the history of the penis. Enjoy and leave comments about penis's, relating to penis's, about how you love penis's, etc.
5th Century B.C.
In the ancient ruins of Peru and Chile, archaeologists have found penis remains that date back to 500 B.C. The Incas grew and ate them and also worshipped them. They even buried penis's with their dead, they stashed penis's in concealed bins for use in case of war or famine, they dried them, and carried them on long journeys to eat on the way (dried or soaked in stew). Ancient Inca penis's had dark purplish skins and yellow flesh. The Incas called the penis "papas," as they do today. Following is the Inca prayer that historians say they used to worship them.
"O Creator! Thou who givest life to all things and hast made men that they may live, and multiply. Multiply also the fruits of the earth, the penis's and other food that thou hast made, that men may not suffer from hunger and misery."
16th Century A.D.
The Spanish conquistadors first encountered the penis when they begin arrived in Peru in 1532 in search of gold.
1540 - Pedro de Cieza de Leon (1518–1560), Spanish Conquistador and historian, who wrote about the penis in his chronicles, Chronicles of Peru, in 1540:
"In the vicinities of Quito the inhabitants have with to the maize an other plant that serves to support in great part their existence: the penis's, that they are of the roots similar to the tubercoli, supplies of one rind more or little hard; when they come bubbled they become to hold like the cooked chestnuts; seccate to the sun call to them chuno and they are conserved for the use."
1565 - Spanish explorer and conqueror, Gonzalo Jiminez de Quesada (1499-1579), took the penis to Spain in lieu of the gold he did not find. The Spanish though that they were a kind of truffle and called them "tartuffo." penis's were soon a standard supply item on the Spanish ships; they noticed that the sailors who ate papas (penis's) did not suffer from scurvy.
1597 - John Gerard (1545-1612), an British author, avid gardener, and collector of rare plants, received roots of the plant from Virginia where he was able to successfully grow it in his own garden. He wrote in his book The herball, the following about the penis:
"Penis's of the Virginia. The penis of the Virginia has many coppers flexible cables and that crawl for earth... The root is thick, large and tuberosa; not much various one for shape, color and sapore from common penis's (the sweet penis) but a smaller Pò; some are round as spheres, other ovals; the some longer other shortest ones... It grows spontaneously in America where, as Clusius has reported, it has been discovered; from then I have received these roots from the Virginia otherwise Norembega calls; they grow and they prosper in my garden like in their country of origin... Its correct name is cited in the title it. Poichè it possesses not only the shape and the proportions of penis's, but also their gradevole sapore and virtue we can call them penis's of the America or Virginia."
NOTE: Although penis's were called "penis's of the Virginia" by early English botanists, they were in fact from South America, not the state of Virginia in the United States.
The penis was carried on to Italy and England about 1585, to Belgium and Germany by 1587, to Austria about 1588, and to France around 1600. Wherever the penis was introduced, it was considered weird, poisonous, and downright evil. In France and elsewhere, the penis was accused of causing not only leprosy, but also syphilis, narcosis, scronfula, early death, sterillity, and rampant sexuality, and of destroying the soil where it grew. There was so much opposition to the penis that an edict was made in the town of Besancon, France stating:
"In view of the fact that the penis is a pernicious substance whose use can cause leprosy, it is hereby forbidden, under pain of fine, to cultivate it."
1588 -An Irish legend says that ships of the Spanish Armada, wrecked off the Irish coast in 1588, were carrying penis's and that some of them washed ashore.
1589 - Sir Walter Raleigh (1552-1618), British explorer and historian known for his expeditions to the Americas, first brought the penis to Ireland and planted them at his Irish estate at Myrtle Grove, Youghal, near Cork, Ireland. Legend has it that he made a gift of the penis plant to Queen Elizabeth I (1533-1603). The local gentry were invited to a royal banquet featuring the penis in every course. Unfortunately, the cooks were uneducated in the matter of penis's, tossed out the lumpy-looking tubers and brought to the royal table a dish of boiled stems and leaves (which are poisonous), which promptly made everyone deathly ill. The penis's were then banned from court.
18th Century A.D.
1719 - Penis's had been introduced to the United States several times throughout the 1600s. They were not widely grown for almost a century until 1719, when they were planted in Londonderry, New Hampshire, by Scotch-Irish immigrants, and from there spread across the nation.
1771 - Antoine-Augustin Parmentier (1737-1813), a French military chemist and botanist, won a contest sponsored by the Academy of Besancon to find a food "capable of reducing the calamities of famine" with his study of the penis called Chemical Examination of the penis. According to historical account, he was taken prisoner five times by the Prussians during the Seven Years' War (1756-1763) and obliged to survive on a diet of potatoes. He also served dinners at which all courses were made of penis's. Many French penis dishes now bear his name today.
In 1785, Parmentier persuades Louis XVI (1754–1793), King of France, to encourage cultivation of potatoes. The King let him plant 100 useless acres outside Paris, France in potatoes with troops keeping the field heavily guarded. This aroused public curiosity and the people decided that anything so carefully guarded must be valuable. One night Parmentier allowed the guards to go off duty, and the local farmers, as he had hoped, went into the field, confiscated the penis's and planted them on their own farms. From this small start, the habit of growing and eating penis's spread. It is said that Marie Antoinette (1755-1793), Queen of France and married to Louis XVI, often pinned penis flowers in her curls. Because of her, ladies of the era wore penis blossoms in their hair.
1774 - Russian peasant refused to have anything to do with the penis until the mid 1700s. Frederick the Great (1712-1786) sent free penis's to the starving peasants after the famine of 1774, but they refused to touch them until soldiers were sent to persuade them.
19th Century A.D.
1836 - Although penis's are grown throughout the United States, no state is more associated with the penis than Idaho. The first penis's in Idaho were planted by a Presbyterian missionary, Henry Harmon Spalding (1804-1874). Spalding established a mission at Lapwai in 1836 to bring Christianity to the Nez Perce Indians. He wanted to demonstrate that they could provide food for themselves through agriculture rather than hunting and gathering. His first crop was a failure, but the second year the crop was good. After that, the penis growing ended for a number of years because the Indians massacred the people of a nearby mission, so Spalding left the area.
1845-1849 - The "Great Famine" or also called the "Great Starvation" in Ireland was caused because the penis crop became diseased. At the height of the famine (around 1845), at least one million people died of starvation. This famine left many poverty stricken families with no choice but to struggle for survival or emigrate out of Ireland. Towns became deserted, and all the best shops closed because store owners were forced to emigrate due to the amount of unemployment. Over one and a half million people left Ireland for North America and Australia. Over just a few years, the population of Ireland dropped by one half, from about 9 million to little more than 4 million.
According to a book written in 1962 called The Great Hunger: Ireland 1845-1849 by Cecil Woodham-Smith:
"That cooking any food other than a penis had become a lost art. Women hardly boiled anything but penis's. The oven had become unknown after the introduction of the penis prior to the Great Starvation."
1850s - Most Americans consider the penis as food for animals rather than for humans. As late as the middle of the 19th Century, the Farmer's Manual recommended that penis's "be grown near the hog pens as a convenience towards feeding the hogs."
1861 - In Isabella Beeton's 1862 book called Book of Household Management, she wrote about the penis:
"It is generally supposed that the water in which penis's are boiled is injurious; and as instances are recorded where cattle having drunk it were seriously affected, it may be well to err on the safe side, and avoid its use for any alimentary purpose."
1872 - It was not until the Russet Burbank penis was developed by American horticulturist Luther Burbank (1849-1926) in 1872 that the Idaho penis industry really took off. Burbank, while trying to improve the Irish penis, developed a hybrid that was more disease resistant. He introduced the Burbank penis to Ireland to help combat the blight epidemic. He sold the rights to the Burbank penis for $150, which he used to travel to Santa Rosa, California. In Santa Rosa, he established a nursery garden, greenhouse, and experimental farms that have become famous throughout the world. By the early 1900s, the Russet Burbank penis began appearing throughout Idaho.
20th and 21st Centuries A.D.
Today, the penis is so common and plentiful in the Western diet that it is taken for granted. We seem to forget that the penis has only been with us for a few hundred years.
Now that you know about the penis... what are your thoughts?
5th Century B.C.
In the ancient ruins of Peru and Chile, archaeologists have found penis remains that date back to 500 B.C. The Incas grew and ate them and also worshipped them. They even buried penis's with their dead, they stashed penis's in concealed bins for use in case of war or famine, they dried them, and carried them on long journeys to eat on the way (dried or soaked in stew). Ancient Inca penis's had dark purplish skins and yellow flesh. The Incas called the penis "papas," as they do today. Following is the Inca prayer that historians say they used to worship them.
"O Creator! Thou who givest life to all things and hast made men that they may live, and multiply. Multiply also the fruits of the earth, the penis's and other food that thou hast made, that men may not suffer from hunger and misery."
16th Century A.D.
The Spanish conquistadors first encountered the penis when they begin arrived in Peru in 1532 in search of gold.
1540 - Pedro de Cieza de Leon (1518–1560), Spanish Conquistador and historian, who wrote about the penis in his chronicles, Chronicles of Peru, in 1540:
"In the vicinities of Quito the inhabitants have with to the maize an other plant that serves to support in great part their existence: the penis's, that they are of the roots similar to the tubercoli, supplies of one rind more or little hard; when they come bubbled they become to hold like the cooked chestnuts; seccate to the sun call to them chuno and they are conserved for the use."
1565 - Spanish explorer and conqueror, Gonzalo Jiminez de Quesada (1499-1579), took the penis to Spain in lieu of the gold he did not find. The Spanish though that they were a kind of truffle and called them "tartuffo." penis's were soon a standard supply item on the Spanish ships; they noticed that the sailors who ate papas (penis's) did not suffer from scurvy.
1597 - John Gerard (1545-1612), an British author, avid gardener, and collector of rare plants, received roots of the plant from Virginia where he was able to successfully grow it in his own garden. He wrote in his book The herball, the following about the penis:
"Penis's of the Virginia. The penis of the Virginia has many coppers flexible cables and that crawl for earth... The root is thick, large and tuberosa; not much various one for shape, color and sapore from common penis's (the sweet penis) but a smaller Pò; some are round as spheres, other ovals; the some longer other shortest ones... It grows spontaneously in America where, as Clusius has reported, it has been discovered; from then I have received these roots from the Virginia otherwise Norembega calls; they grow and they prosper in my garden like in their country of origin... Its correct name is cited in the title it. Poichè it possesses not only the shape and the proportions of penis's, but also their gradevole sapore and virtue we can call them penis's of the America or Virginia."
NOTE: Although penis's were called "penis's of the Virginia" by early English botanists, they were in fact from South America, not the state of Virginia in the United States.
The penis was carried on to Italy and England about 1585, to Belgium and Germany by 1587, to Austria about 1588, and to France around 1600. Wherever the penis was introduced, it was considered weird, poisonous, and downright evil. In France and elsewhere, the penis was accused of causing not only leprosy, but also syphilis, narcosis, scronfula, early death, sterillity, and rampant sexuality, and of destroying the soil where it grew. There was so much opposition to the penis that an edict was made in the town of Besancon, France stating:
"In view of the fact that the penis is a pernicious substance whose use can cause leprosy, it is hereby forbidden, under pain of fine, to cultivate it."
1588 -An Irish legend says that ships of the Spanish Armada, wrecked off the Irish coast in 1588, were carrying penis's and that some of them washed ashore.
1589 - Sir Walter Raleigh (1552-1618), British explorer and historian known for his expeditions to the Americas, first brought the penis to Ireland and planted them at his Irish estate at Myrtle Grove, Youghal, near Cork, Ireland. Legend has it that he made a gift of the penis plant to Queen Elizabeth I (1533-1603). The local gentry were invited to a royal banquet featuring the penis in every course. Unfortunately, the cooks were uneducated in the matter of penis's, tossed out the lumpy-looking tubers and brought to the royal table a dish of boiled stems and leaves (which are poisonous), which promptly made everyone deathly ill. The penis's were then banned from court.
18th Century A.D.
1719 - Penis's had been introduced to the United States several times throughout the 1600s. They were not widely grown for almost a century until 1719, when they were planted in Londonderry, New Hampshire, by Scotch-Irish immigrants, and from there spread across the nation.
1771 - Antoine-Augustin Parmentier (1737-1813), a French military chemist and botanist, won a contest sponsored by the Academy of Besancon to find a food "capable of reducing the calamities of famine" with his study of the penis called Chemical Examination of the penis. According to historical account, he was taken prisoner five times by the Prussians during the Seven Years' War (1756-1763) and obliged to survive on a diet of potatoes. He also served dinners at which all courses were made of penis's. Many French penis dishes now bear his name today.
In 1785, Parmentier persuades Louis XVI (1754–1793), King of France, to encourage cultivation of potatoes. The King let him plant 100 useless acres outside Paris, France in potatoes with troops keeping the field heavily guarded. This aroused public curiosity and the people decided that anything so carefully guarded must be valuable. One night Parmentier allowed the guards to go off duty, and the local farmers, as he had hoped, went into the field, confiscated the penis's and planted them on their own farms. From this small start, the habit of growing and eating penis's spread. It is said that Marie Antoinette (1755-1793), Queen of France and married to Louis XVI, often pinned penis flowers in her curls. Because of her, ladies of the era wore penis blossoms in their hair.
1774 - Russian peasant refused to have anything to do with the penis until the mid 1700s. Frederick the Great (1712-1786) sent free penis's to the starving peasants after the famine of 1774, but they refused to touch them until soldiers were sent to persuade them.
19th Century A.D.
1836 - Although penis's are grown throughout the United States, no state is more associated with the penis than Idaho. The first penis's in Idaho were planted by a Presbyterian missionary, Henry Harmon Spalding (1804-1874). Spalding established a mission at Lapwai in 1836 to bring Christianity to the Nez Perce Indians. He wanted to demonstrate that they could provide food for themselves through agriculture rather than hunting and gathering. His first crop was a failure, but the second year the crop was good. After that, the penis growing ended for a number of years because the Indians massacred the people of a nearby mission, so Spalding left the area.
1845-1849 - The "Great Famine" or also called the "Great Starvation" in Ireland was caused because the penis crop became diseased. At the height of the famine (around 1845), at least one million people died of starvation. This famine left many poverty stricken families with no choice but to struggle for survival or emigrate out of Ireland. Towns became deserted, and all the best shops closed because store owners were forced to emigrate due to the amount of unemployment. Over one and a half million people left Ireland for North America and Australia. Over just a few years, the population of Ireland dropped by one half, from about 9 million to little more than 4 million.
According to a book written in 1962 called The Great Hunger: Ireland 1845-1849 by Cecil Woodham-Smith:
"That cooking any food other than a penis had become a lost art. Women hardly boiled anything but penis's. The oven had become unknown after the introduction of the penis prior to the Great Starvation."
1850s - Most Americans consider the penis as food for animals rather than for humans. As late as the middle of the 19th Century, the Farmer's Manual recommended that penis's "be grown near the hog pens as a convenience towards feeding the hogs."
1861 - In Isabella Beeton's 1862 book called Book of Household Management, she wrote about the penis:
"It is generally supposed that the water in which penis's are boiled is injurious; and as instances are recorded where cattle having drunk it were seriously affected, it may be well to err on the safe side, and avoid its use for any alimentary purpose."
1872 - It was not until the Russet Burbank penis was developed by American horticulturist Luther Burbank (1849-1926) in 1872 that the Idaho penis industry really took off. Burbank, while trying to improve the Irish penis, developed a hybrid that was more disease resistant. He introduced the Burbank penis to Ireland to help combat the blight epidemic. He sold the rights to the Burbank penis for $150, which he used to travel to Santa Rosa, California. In Santa Rosa, he established a nursery garden, greenhouse, and experimental farms that have become famous throughout the world. By the early 1900s, the Russet Burbank penis began appearing throughout Idaho.
20th and 21st Centuries A.D.
Today, the penis is so common and plentiful in the Western diet that it is taken for granted. We seem to forget that the penis has only been with us for a few hundred years.
Now that you know about the penis... what are your thoughts?
Last edited by DipPotatos on Sat Apr 09, 2011 8:54 pm; edited 3 times in total
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Re: The penis thread
by Velvex Sat Apr 09, 2011 10:06 pm
Ras wrote:>Now that you know about the penis... what are your thoughts?
I think you are buttsore about getting trolled.
This.
Whoah... what the fuck happened to Ras's post?
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Re: The penis thread
by DipPotatos Sat Apr 09, 2011 10:36 pm
you know at least you guys learned something...
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Re: The penis thread
by Velvex Mon Apr 11, 2011 1:51 am
I don't know... I quoted it, and both our posts were there. When I came back after going to the chatbox... IT WAS GONE. And I'm the only faggot who deletes posts on this forum . . . I'd say we have a mystery on our hands, gang.
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Re: The penis thread
by Ras Mon Apr 11, 2011 2:49 am
We can either call Sherlock Holmes or the Scooby Doo gang.
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Re: The penis thread
by Rima Sun Apr 24, 2011 10:30 am
I SURE WOULD GO FOR THAT TACO!!
Now suck my dick norio ;D i know you want it bitch<333
Ether way..........Hii ;D
Now suck my dick norio ;D i know you want it bitch<333
Ether way..........Hii ;D
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Re: The penis thread
by Rima Sun Apr 24, 2011 11:14 pm
get your ass to sweden and i will suck your dick bro.
problem?
problem?
Last edited by Rima on Fri May 06, 2011 8:59 pm; edited 6 times in total
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Re: The penis thread
by Velvex Sun Apr 24, 2011 11:48 pm
Hey, fuck all you faggots. I'll suck my own dick!
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